Is This Business E-mail Offensive?

I received the e-mail below from a site visitor asking if I found it offensive. They were clearly upset and felt the following e-mail was unprofessional and downright rude.

It is typed exactly as it was provided to me (names/details changed to protect the guilty/innocent):

Hi, Jane:

In the future, please give me time to do the updates before sending out the AB & letters.

I am traveling and doing interim visits, plus answering sites’ telephone calls with questions, rescheduling visits due to ABCs canceling appointments and trying to get trips re-scheduled with Acme Travel without breaking the budget.

I do not want the AB and treatment tables removed. Now I have to re-create them at the next visit when there will probably be both to report.

Thank you,
John

Not offensive…. but a bit terse. I’m not privy to the situation or if the sender had asked for cooperation before to know what tone should be taken, but I do know you attract more bees with honey!

I’ve added my suggestions in red to soften the request just a bit.

Hi, Jane:

Could you do me a favor? In the future, please give me time to do the updates before sending out the AB & letters — that would help me not having to do double-work on the next visit.

With all the traveling and interim visits I am doing, plus answering sites’ telephone calls with questions, rescheduling visits due to ABCs canceling appointments and trying to get trips re-scheduled with Acme Travel without breaking the budget, your help with this would be greatly appreciated.

I am trying to avoid having the AB and treatment tables removed. With your help, I won’t have to re-create them at the next visit when there will probably be both to report.

Thanks so much for your help! If you have any questions, please do let me know!

John

See the difference choosing your words carefully combined with how you choose to use them can make a big difference in tone? And in the case above, foster future cooperation and positive relationship building.

Some More Info for You:

1. How to Block Offensive E-mails