Business Email & Empathy

So many of us are now doing business online, and with that, we often forget they are living, feeling human beings on the other side. As a result, with technology now tightly integrated into our business activities and tools, it has become one of our primary relationship-building tools.

The Human on the Other Side of the Screen

Showing courtesy, being thoughtful, and ensuring clarity in your communications helps to build confidence in doing business with you. Doing so also contributes to relationship building.

On the other hand, if you have an “all bout me” mentality in your email use, that opportunity will elude you. It is a little red flag that can hinder potential partners and business relationships.

Invaluable are the emails that reflect concern for the other side. When you need assistance, and someone responds promptly and thoughtfully to your request, those are the individuals and companies you want to continue doing business with. These are the folks that we naturally want to nurture a relationship with.

Empathy Lost

As I often do, I use my experiences as examples for my posts. Today, I’ll share one event that many of you have experienced as well: your computer’s hard drive crashing.

When I had a hard drive failure, it solidified some of my client relationships and damaged others. One morning, I woke up, booted up my computer, only to hear a weird clicking sound. I knew what that was. Drat.

Because of this, I had to send out an update about my situation from my laptop. I noted that my usual fast response time would likely be delayed as I worked things out.

I apologized for any requests that may have gotten lost in the shuffle and asked that they resend anything that needed my attention. Then, I let them know that one way or another, I should be back to business as usual within 24 hours.

The responses I received were very telling, and several were disappointing. Most sent notes of sympathy and wished me luck. Been there, done that, and “I feel your pain. Take your time — no hurry!”

But, unfortunately, from others, not a word about my situation other than “What about my changes?!” “Can’t you figure out a way to do them today anyway!?”

By the way, none of these “changes” were time sensitive or would be business-damaging if not implemented within 24 hours.

Empathy Matters

If you’ve ever had hard drive problems, you know what it is like. You are panicked and scrambling. Searching backups and trying to save all possible data can keep you pretty occupied.

Then add that you are working to determine whether you can salvage that computer or if you need to run out and get a new one to set up. And the unexpected expenses that go with that.

Indeed, I didn’t expect this to happen, nor would I wish it upon anyone. However, I was committed to keeping all my business contacts up to date as best I could.

I wanted to keep everyone posted so they would not be concerned about my lack of response and confirm that I would process their requests as soon as possible. That’s the best I could do in that moment.

The Worst Scenario

Then, when realizing my hard drive was shot and that I would have no choice but to go out and purchase a new computer, I sent out a courtesy notice explaining that over the next 24 hours, I would be out of pocket but would get to requests promptly as soon as I was back up and running hopefully by the end of the next day.

Finally, I thanked everyone again for their patience and understanding. Here again, kind-hearted clients sent notes of encouragement. But, then, this email came in:

That’s all the email said. No greeting, no sign-off, just the above comment.

Judge Based on Actions

You’ll run into all kinds of people online. Many times, you don’t really get to know them until a situation exposes their true colors. Good and bad.

Don’t underestimate for a moment how your emails and your reactions to others’ problems, dilemmas, or misfortunes will reflect on you. How you do so will let them know what it will be like when the going gets tough for either of you.

Including what it will be like to do business with you. Would you want to do business with someone who responded in this manner to your misfortune?

For me, I am blessed to have a group of great folks I work with and will always go the extra mile for those who do the same for me. However, these outliers — relatively new clients — clarified what type of relationship ours would be.

Type unto others as you would have them type unto you. Your business partnerships depend upon it.